Saturday, December 1, 2012

No, actually it's not ironic, if truth be told

(Things have been more than a little crazy - sorry for the huge delay in this.)

Today’s Desert Island Disc conversation is with my friend Cara. We've also known Cara for more than 20 years and she did not come from that incestuous gene pool called,  Bronx High School of Science (which makes her, out of the gate, a more interesting person.)  Cara  is the definition of a guy's gal; she loves sports, is a great cook and has one of the raunchiest senses of humor.  She literally can make a construction worker blush. She truly loves to cook and had her kitchen designed to facilitate her passion.

Cara and her husband, Matt (his turn will be coming up soon) are extremely generous people who open up their hearts and homes to their friends on a regular basis.  We have spent many a happy hour, stuffing our faces in their kitchen. 

Cara  is currently VP, Assistant General Counsel at JP Morgan (and one of the last men standing from the old Bear, Stearns & Co.)


Music (in no particular order)

Isn’t it Ironic - Alanis Morrisette -



I enjoy her breakthrough album Jagged Little Pill. This song fits my life and in particular, it would be ironic if I was stuck on a desert island, listening to this song. (editor's note - Cara clearly understands that most of the situations expressed in the song were, in fact, not ironic.)


Crossfire - Stevie Ray Vaughn -



Stevie Ray's playing is phenomenal. His vocals in the song are decent here, but his playing is really stellar - it's his true voice.


Friend of the Devil - Grateful Dead -



I basically ignored them during my  High School years.  The deadheads at my school (Music & Art) were a little annoying. I began to appreciate the band in college and by the time I started hanging out with Matthew (a major deadhead), I was hooked.

Now, every time I listen to them, I'm reminded of my 20s - all those good times and pre-kids.


Defying Gravity from the musical Wicked



I love this musical: the whole musical and any song sung by Idina Menzel and/or Kristen Chenowith.  I am no closet show tune lover; I am a bona fide one.  (editor note: while this is not a shocking admission from an alum of  Music and Art, it is a surprising aspect of Cara's personality.  It's similar to finding out that Jack Black is a big musical fan - it doesn't fit one's preconceived notion of the individual but it totally makes sense once you think about it.)


After the Goldrush - Neil Young -



I was introduced to Neil Young early in High School; first, when he joined CSN, but then I caught up with his individual music at 15, when I went to summer camp.  I clearly remember the first of his songs that had a special meaning for me, (Sugar Mountain) but I learned to play After the Goldrush on the guitar.  I love the imagery as well as his singing. Neil's voice on this track is heartbreakingly beautiful. 

I've found most of his songs are great and anyone can sing them (including Matthew).


Scenes From An Italian Restaurant - Billy Joel -



I've always loved Billy Joel and still do (I feel bad that his personal life and alcohol addiction have hurt him but what can you do).


I’m a Believer - Smash Mouth -



I like Smash Mouth (shoutout to Maya, her daughter). I came to this song through Shrek and I would pick the Shrek Album to go with me to the desert island. (A sidebar discussion came up, once again about the restrictive nature of choosing only 8 songs and not 8 albums. The rules of this exercise, as well as life, are caprious and arbitrary. ) This song makes me happy and I think I need a good frame of mind to keep up my sprits on the island. 


If You want to Sing out - Cat Stevens -



I love the early work of Cat Stevens; it makes me happy. I love that music and I can see me singing the song while I collect firewood on the island for meals and to keep me and Wilson warm.

I simply have no connection to his incarnation as Yusuf.



I've added a question not in the original Desert Island Disc,  How have your musical taste changed over the years?

My musical tastes have always been evolved or maybe not at all. I sang tons of classical pieces at Music & Art (generally made me sleepy though I still like intricate harmonies regardless of language of origin) and I had a chance to sing gospel in H.S (still gives me the shivers but never sounds as good to me recorded as it does live) but I know enough to recognize that I do not have the chops to sing it on a desert island. All the family music I was allowed to listen to was opera/classical (these were our car and living room mainstays,) Frank Sinatra, Shirley Bassey, Gilbert and Sullivan, Johnny Cash/The Carter Sisters, show tunes, folk (Joan Baez/Bob Dylan, still love them), Carole King, Barbra Streisand and Neil Diamond. Needless to say I still have a softness in my heart for the ones I can sing too (yeah Neil, “Shilo”).


How have your children affected your musical taste?

My kids know that if any one of us can sing to it and it does not give me a headache, I am more than happy to listen to all kinds of music (where you can sing to it and not get a headache so perhaps the universe is a little smaller then they want). Maya has introduced me to some really fun artists (and a few depressing ones) and Cayne has generally played anything you can get pumped up to before you play basketball (big headache but I tolerate it as how can you stop someone from getting pumped up before a game). Both kids love to shock me and I do not shock easily (and of course if it is too shocking, Cayne loses his iTunes privileges for a month (like September 2012).


What Book would you take with you?:

 That's easy, SAS Survival Handbook by John “Lofty” Wiseman


Luxury Item?:

Luxury item- Does the largest Swiss Army Knife count?  I'd like to bring a solar powered refrigerator with ice maker. (I'll give you electricity, so you don't need the solar power.  What brand of refrigerator?  Do you want it stocked with anything?) Whichever fridge with freezer/icemaker and water on the door Consumer Reports says is the longest lasting without maintenance would be my choice. Preferably a Liebher SBS32S1 (31 cu.ft) or a Whirlpool WSF26C3EXW (26 cu.ft). I would like it stocked with cheese and white wine but if I have to choose one, it would be cheese as I am sure I can ferment (fruit/grain/sugar cane) something on the island (Hawkeye managed it) and cows/goats/sheep are probably harder to find.

Thursday, November 29, 2012

Light a house up rather than save a watt

Today's theme - People who like to flex their carbon foot print - Christmas Light Shows:









But no one has the Faucher family beat.  Last Christmastime, their light display in a Delawate suburb had over a million-bulbs and cost an estimated $82,320 to light!



It's nice to see that the public is helping suport the public utilities.  You know that they are barely eking out a living.

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

The Analytical Engine weaves algebraic patterns ...

...just as the Jacquard loom weaves flowers and leaves. - Ada Lovelace


While you read this today on your computer, let us ruminate upon the life of Ada Lovelace, who died on this date in 1852.



Ada would have seemed to have been born into a charmed life. She was the only child of a titled lord and a very wealthy mother. Unfortunately for her, her father was the notorious, womanizing homosexual (let your mind rattle that around for a second) and not half bad poet Lord Byron.


She was named after Byron's half-sister, Augusta Leigh, by whom he was rumoured to have fathered a child (oh yeah, I forgot to mention that - he slept with his half sister). It was Augusta who encouraged Byron to marry to avoid scandal, and he reluctantly chose Annabella Milbanke (very wealthy heiress and noted stick-in-the-mud). On January 16, 1816, Annabella left Byron, taking 1-month old Ada with her. On April 21, Byron signed the Deed of Separation and left England for good a few days later. He was never allowed to see either of them again.


Ada lived with her mother, as is apparent in her father's correspondence concerning her. Lady Byron was also highly interested in mathematics (Lord Byron once called her "the princess of parallelograms"), which dominated her life, even after marriage. Her obsession with rooting out any of the insanity of which she accused Lord Byron was one of the reasons why Annabella taught Ada mathematics at an early age. Ada was privately home schooled in mathematics and science by William Frend, William King and Mary Somerville. One of her later tutors was Augustus De Morgan. An active member of London society, she was a member of the Bluestockings in her youth.


In 1835 she married William King, 8th Baron King, later 1st Earl of Lovelace. Her full name and title for most of her married life was The Right Honourable Augusta Ada, Countess of Lovelace. She is widely known in modern times simply as Ada Lovelace, or by her birth name, Ada Byron.

Mary Somerville, one of her tutors, was a noted researcher and scientific author of the 19th century, who introduced her in turn to Charles Babbage on June 5, 1833. Other acquaintances were Sir David Brewster, Charles Wheatstone, Charles Dickens and Michael Faraday. She apparently ran in heady circles for her day.


During a nine-month period in 1842-1843, Ada translated Italian mathematician Luigi Menabrea's memoir on Babbage's newest proposed machine, the Analytical Engine. With the article, she appended a set of notes which specified in complete detail a method for calculating Bernoulli numbers with the Engine, recognized by historians as the world's first computer program.



Lovelace's prose also acknowledged some possibilities of the machine which Babbage never published, such as speculating that "the Engine might compose elaborate and scientific pieces of music of any degree of complexity or extent."

Ada Lovelace was bled to death at the age of 36 by her physicians, who were trying to treat her uterine cancer, on this day. Thus, she perished, coincidentally, at the same age as her father and from the same cause - medicinal bloodletting. So while she considered the possible of the computer, doctors were still using leeches to cure their patients.

At her request, Lovelace was buried next to the father she never knew at the Church of St. Mary Magdalene in Hucknall, Nottingham.

Sunday, November 25, 2012

The Fifth Annual Christmas Spectacular

The holidays are upon us and we here at Dr. Caligari's love to celebrate like it nobody's business. So over the next several weeks check back here to see what we're listening to or thinking about - Today's kick-off - really bad Christmas music (we'll have a few versions of this entry.)

You've spent this past weekend shopping at the Department Stores; you're in a grouchy mood. Here's some music to extend the feeling.

Christmas Carols with that unpleasant feeling:

Back Door Santa -
Bon Jovi is usually not my cup of tea. But this Christmas classic made me reconsider, just listen to the song -



It's exactly what you think it's about and nothing says Christmas like a song about the joys of sodomy during the holidays, sung by Jersey's other native son.


Merry Christmas with Love -
I will try very hard to keep this promise



I will only play anything associated with Clay Aikens one other time this holiday. The people from the Geneva Convention have already called. As a matter of fact, I suggest you put your head phone on and listen to NIN Closer several times until the feeling goes away.



Baby, It's Cold Outside -
It's not really a holiday song but it always seems to show up this time of year.



This song seems to be a cautionary lesson for young women everywhere; never leave home without you hat, gloves and a can of pepper spray when you stop off at Dean Martin's house during inclement weather.


Christmas Shoes -
You knew it was coming, what would Christmas be with out the song about the strange child's need to buy his dying mother a pair of whore's shoes.



So many questions:  where is this kids father?; where is the store security?; where are child services?  I need a drink after this one.


Do They Know It's Christmas? -
What's not to love about a song when rich smug English singers get together after a few pints and try to shame you into making a contribution to their favorite charity?



And no - they probably don't have calendars and they probably don't celebrate Christmas.


Dog barking Jingle Bells -
Please, I beg you, just skip to the next video.



See now that you've watched it, you're reconsidering Michael Vicks convictions.


I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus -
Poor Michael, if only he hadn't seen this horrible scene



perhaps Joe wouldn't have beaten him so much, there wouldn't have been so many child sleep overs and maybe he'd still be alive!


Please Daddy Don't Get Drunk This Christmas -
Another C & W classic. I can't believe this hasn't been options for a Hallmark special.



This song has everything the holidays should be about - alcoholism, child abuse, tears and then drunken sex and/or spousal abuse.


What do you get a wookie for Christmas?
Christmas without Star Wars would be unthinkable -



but I bet you'd give it a shot


Merry Merry

Thursday, November 22, 2012

Not quite the Butterball hotline

This is a message for my family but feel free you use, if needed



(If you are of a certain age and lived in the NYC area, this is what was playing on WOR in the afternoon after the parade ended.)

Sorry I'm not with you this Thanksgiving.  If you can't reach me by phone, need are the recipes you're probably looking for:


Shrimp Dip


Appetizers:
Carrots/ Celery Sticks
Pre-cubed Cheese from local deli
Olives


Turkey w/ Stuffing


Potatoes
version 1 or
version 2


Vegetables
Ginger Carrots
Roasted Brussel Sprouts
Green Beans


Fennel Salad


Dessert
Apple Crisp
Brownies
Vanilla Ice Cream
Butter Pecan Ice Cream
Coffee/ Tea


Have a great Thanksgiving and hopefully you've remembered to check your guns at the door!

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

I'm just saying


Nate Silver should be doing the superiority dance right now


And armed guards should hold down Karl 'Turd Blossom' Rove


and Nate should take a long soaking piss on him.

Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Halloween (via the wayback machine.)

(I was getting ready to post this just before the lights went out on Monday night.)

Ancient Romans celebrated a holiday called Feralia on February 21. At first it was a simple day off to recover from the holiday of February 20 (Salvia Divinorum), and to take care of last minute shopping before the holiday of February 22 (Salta Boca).


It was, coincidentally, the last day of the year according to the Roman calendar.

Over time it became a sacred day in its own right. It became a festival to honor the dead, and like most Roman holidays it involved some serious drinking. Feralia also resembled most other Roman holidays in that it outlasted the western Roman empire. The jolly men and women of the Mediterranean basin saw no reason to give up the riotous holiday, with all its drinking and orgies, despite countless reminders from an ascendant Christian church that drinking was bad (unless it was Jesus' blood) and orgies were worse.



At last, in the 7th century, Pope Boniface IV decided that the holiday was Christian after all, except that instead of honoring all the dead it should honor only dead saints, that instead of Feralia it should be called All Saints' Day, that instead of drinking and orgies it should be a day of prayer and meditation, and that instead of February 21 it should be observed on May 13.

The good peoples of the Christian world happily accepted the new name and date, but persisted in drinking and orgying. As punishment for this inappropriate enjoyment, Pope Gregory III moved it to November 1, and unwittingly laid the foundation for our modern Halloween.

Hold that thought.



Since as early as the 5th century BC, the ancient Celts had considered October 31 the last day of summer. They called the day Samhain (rhymes with Clamhain), and they believed all the divisions between the world of the living and the world of the dead were dissolved for that brief period. They thought the dead used this window of opportunity to possess the souls of the living, and the thought scared the piss out of them.

A variety of bizarre rituals to ward off the dead accumulated around Samhain over the centuries, including the sacrificial burning of virgins (when any could be found).

When these Celtic rituals collided with the Christian All Saints' Day, all hell broke loose. People didn't know whether they should pray, drink, orgy, burn virgins, or what. They tried a lot of different combination: they got drunk and prayed, they burned virgins and got drunk, they prayed to have orgies and got drunk with virgins, they prayed then got drunk and had orgies with virgins.



Eventually they settled on sending their kids out in silly costumes to ask their neighbors for candy. This was intended to keep them out of the house while the drinking and orgies raged, but since everyone's doorbells kept ringing from everyone else's children, the drinking and orgies gradually faded away.

Of course, this brief outline only traces the development of Halloween as we know it in America. The holiday is still celebrated in countries all over the world in an astonishing number of ways.



In Bulgaria, for example, October 31 is a national holiday called Pazardzhik. In rural districts, children dress up as kitchen utensils and dash from farm to farm tying chickens' feet together. Any unhappy farmer attempting to shoo the children away from his chickens will find himself pelted with manure and glass shards as the children sing playful Pazardzhik carols. In Mexico, the Day of the Dead lasts from October 31 through November 2, which has long been a concern to students of the Mexican calendar. The celebration is a fusion of sixteenth-century Spaniards' All Souls' and All Saints' Days and the Aztec festival honoring Mictecacihuatl, the Aztec goddess of the dead. (Mictecacihuatl was said to have died at birth as the result of complications relating to pronunciation.)



One can't help but marvel at the similarities between the Day of the Dead that arose in Meso-America and Kyrgyzstan's Day of the Very Sick (Nov 1), Papua New Guinea's Evening of the Emotionally Exhausted (Oct 31), and Vanuatu's Cardiovascular Appreciation Days (Oct 31 - Nov 2).

In Saudi Arabia, October 31 is Sandy Night. As soon as the sun sets, children scamper out into the desert and fill their home-made bags with sand. The holiday is believed to be derived from the ancient Bedouin tradition of sending children out to fill bags with sand.



In Chile, Halloween is infused with ancient Incan traditions. Fretful mothers extinguish the fires in their hearths for fear of attracting Spaniards while naughty children take their parents hostage and demand their weight in chocolate.



In Wittenberg, Germany, October 31 is celebrated as the day on which Martin Luther nailed his 95 Theses to the door of the church in 1517. Many of the town's children frolic giddily about, nailing Theses here and there with impish delight, while others try to catch and burn them as heretics.



Whatever your own tradition, enjoy Halloween. Be carefull out there though - if there is no power or lights in your area. why not stay inside.


Enjoy your day