Monday, July 27, 2020

Dunandunate




The overuse of a word or phrase that has recently been added to your own vocabulary. This particular word has been rejected by the Oxford English Dictionary several times over the past ten years, making it a word by its continual rejection.



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Saturday, July 25, 2020

The ACME Eagle Hand Soap Radio Hour (181)




Thank you for joining us today.


Before our feature presentation, ACME would like to start the evening with another Bugs Bunny Looney Tunes cartoon, the 1951 The Rabbit Fire, (featuring Daffy Duck and Elmer Fudd in the first in the 'hunting trilogy') directed by Chuck Jones.



The film marks a significant change in Daffy's style, away from the "screwball" and toward the "foil" for Bugs' jokes. However this is the only one of the hunting trilogy where they attempt to work together to rid themselves of Elmer.

Before the start of our feature presentation ACME Eagle Hand Soap would like to bring you another parody song from Shirley Serban during this pandemic - Stay Away.



Unfortunately the world doesn't want us at this time and I'm not sure that I blame them.


We hope you are doing well with your self quarantines - the programming department of The ACME Eagle Hand Soap Radio Hour have been vigorously scrubbing themselves with ACME Eagle Hand Soap - If your eagle's hands are dirty, we'll wash them clean! and sanitizing themselves for your protection. We are also engaged in social distancing - we are communicating with each other via mandatory pantless zoom meetings and drone-o-grams.

We've picked another entry from the excellent reference book, 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die by Steven Jay Schneider for today's feature. Today choice - the under-appreciated 1945 Michael Powell, Emeric Pressburger romantic comedy, I Know Where I'm Going!, the directors actually were trying to direct a different film at time but the cameras (Technicolor cameras) weren't available.. Please join ACME Eagle Hand Soap Radio Hour in watching this neglected hit, I Know Where I'm Going! -



The movie was originally meant to star Deborah Kerr and James Mason but Kerr could not get out of her contract with MGM, so they cast Wendy Hiller. James Mason was originally cast as Torquil, but declined when told he would have to "live rough" in the islands. Ironically, Roger Livesey never went to the islands because he was in a West End show at the time. A double was used for long shots and all close-ups are shot in the studio. Mason has always contended that it was Michael Powell's reluctance to pay the expenses of Mason's wife on the location shoot.




Demand Euphoria!


Monday, July 20, 2020

Saturday, July 18, 2020

The ACME Eagle Hand Soap Radio Hour (180)



Thank you for joining us today.


Before our feature presentation, ACME would like to start the evening with another Bugs Bunny Looney Tunes cartoon, the 1951 The Fair-Haired Hare, (featuring Yosemite Sam) directed by Friz Freleng.



It was the first short released in which Yosemite Sam was drawn with his mouth in his red mustache for almost the entire film, barring the scene in court, and the scene after Sam drinks the carrot juice, where his bottom lips can be seen. It is also one of the few cartoons where Sam refers to Bugs by name.


Before the start of our feature presentation ACME Eagle Hand Soap would like to bring you another important message during this pandemic - please, wear your mask.



Don't be like the governor of a certain southern state - wear a mask!


We hope you are doing well with your self quarantines - the programming department of The ACME Eagle Hand Soap Radio Hour have been vigorously scrubbing themselves with ACME Eagle Hand Soap - If your eagle's hands are dirty, we'll wash them clean! and sanitizing themselves for your protection. We are also engaged in social distancing - we are communicating with each other via mandatory pant-less zoom meetings and drone-o-grams.

We've picked another entry from the excellent reference book, 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die by Steven Jay Schneider for today's feature. Today choice - the 1944 Otto Preminger classic noir detective story, Laura, introducing David Raskin's haunting main theme to popular music. Like all classic noir films, the mood and the mise en scene are so perfect, that the actual mystery is almost secondary to the film. Please join ACME Eagle Hand Soap Radio Hour in watching this classic noir tale, Laura -



When Producer and Director Otto Preminger had a chance to look at the first batch of dailies that came back, he was aghast, "I had chosen a simple dressing gown for (Dame) Judith Anderson but (Rouben Mamoulian), influenced perhaps by association (by) the Medea role for which she was famous, had dressed her in something flowing and Grecian. It was totally wrong for a contemporary story and so were his sets. The performances were appalling. (Dame) Judith Anderson was overacting, Dana Andrews and Gene Tierney were amateurish and there was even something wrong with Clifton Webb's performance." Preminger promptly had the rushes air-mailed to Twentieth Century Fox studio head Darryl F. Zanuck in New York City so that he could see for himself what was happening with Laura. Zanuck agreed that it was a mess and ordered Rouben Mamoulian to shoot everything over again. Preminger, he reiterated, was still barred from the set. When the second set of dailies proved to be just as bad as the first, if not worse, Darryl F. Zanuck decided to remove Rouben Mamoulian from this movie altogether. Finally the words that Otto Preminger had wanted to hear all along came from Zanuck's mouth when he returned to Los Angeles, California. "Monday", he told Preminger, "you can start directing 'Laura'. From scratch."


Before you go - Bunkies, here's another one of our favorite alter kockers, seen wandering around a Long Island neighborhood, with time on his hands (please excuse the nausea inducing camera work.)-



Once again, it's interesting to see how 70 something year old millionaires are spending their days.



Demand Euphoria!

Monday, July 13, 2020

Meldrop


A drop of mucus at the nose, whether produced by cold or otherwise.



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Saturday, July 11, 2020

When life gives you lemons, chunk them right back

Ok, I'm 60. Can't pretend that I'm not. As you may know my high priced laywers from ACME have urged me to avoid copyright issues with the BBC, so a few years ago, I teamed up with Toho Studios and renamed my Desert Island Discs selections, Godzilla's Atoll LPs, brought to you by ACME Eagle Hand Soap Radio Hour.

(In case you've never heard of the BBC show Desert Island Disc - people are asked what music they would bring with them if they were stranded on an island for an indefinite period of time.

Here are the rules:

1.) You make choose 8 pieces of music and tell me why you chose them.
2.) You then get to choose one book to take with you (you automatically get to take the Complete Works of Shakespeare and either the Bible or another appropriate religious or philosophical work.) 3.) You get to choose one luxury, which must be inanimate and of no use in escaping the island or allowing communication from outside. (You can cheat here - since you can listen to music, there is some form of electric, so you may have refrigeration for your luxury item.)


There is nothing profound or deep in my Godzilla's Atoll LP choices - they're just songs that I like (in no particular order)


Shine On You Crazy Diamond (I - IX) - Pink Floyd



I really like Pink Floyd and yet, I almost never pick a cut of theirs for my choices - I think that choosing your favorite Pink Floyd cut is like choosing you favorite kid. But I think knowing that this is a tribute to founding and former band member Syd Barrett who allegedly was in attendance at its recording, unbeknownst to the band, adds an extra frisson to listening to it.


The Low Spark of High-Heeled Boys - Traffic



If ever a song was written to listen to on a beach at sunset - this is it. (also this is another great cheat for me, hearing this song will remind me of the great cover version that Ricki Lee Jones did. I read a wonderful comment about it, saying that she sang the cover like she wrote it herself.)


Take One Last Look - Tom Waits



You probably shouldn't be maudlin on a desert island. But should the need arise, this song would do the trick within the first 30 seconds.


Bad Reputation - Joan Jett



If ever I had a low energy day on the island, this would have to be my go-to song.


Beyond Belief - Elvis Costello



Even on a desert island, you need songs about almost empty gin palaces - Imperial Bedroom comes through


Home At Last - Steely Dan



Ah, the ever present Steely Dan cut. I probably wouldn't need a Steely Dan song; I could call them up at will in my mind. But this is a beachie feeling one and it seems to be an appropriate one this year. And I won't forget my Steely Dan tshirt!


How Insensitive (Insensatez) - Frank Sinatra



As I've gotten older, I 'm more and more appreciating the older Sinatra - I picked one of the bossa nova hits; why wouldn't you listen to a bossa nova Sinatra song while you're on a desert island.


Mohammed's Radio - Warren Zevon



I have a very strange attraction to this song. I have heard Warren Zevon sing most of his songs drunk and sober. This one almost sounds better when sung as a drunken fan. More importantly, this song always reminds me of driving home, very late at night on a summer night, (I have the same feeling when I hear the song, Leaving Las Vegas. I can remember hearing Vin Scela premiere the whole album on his song.)


The book I'd take with me would be The Tale of Genji by Murasaki Shikibu translated by Edward Seidensticker (hard cover)

I could spend much of the time making my way through this dense novel. As always, the luxury item would be a refrigerator full of Bombay Sapphire (and maybe, tub of kalamata olivies.)

so that's eight songs (and that's all you're allowed.) This year I feel rushed with my choices - I feel that I've forgotten some. I'll try to get marooned again next year for my birthday, and see how I do.



Demand Euphoria!

Monday, July 6, 2020

Acnestis


The part of the back (or backbone) between the shoulder blades and the loins which an animal cannot reach to scratch



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Saturday, July 4, 2020

A very Happy and Healthy Fourth of July!

Unlike in years past, Mrs. Dr. Caligari, SOS, Godzilla and I are staying in our secret location, doing our part to stop the spread of COVID-19.)

(This photo was taken by by CIA operatives several years ago.)

Remember - fireworks and hand sanitizers do not mix!



Find some neighbor who refuses to wear a face mask to light them for you.

Hope you're enjoying your holiday - Here's a few shorts before the main feature today:





Once again, ACME would like to share their salute to this Independence Day with the annual playing of the Bruce Springsteen clip of Fourth of July,



sponsored by ACME Split Buns - Slip your ACME Snappy Weinie - The Almost 100% all beef frank (but hey don't ask what the other stuff in it is) - in our well buttered Split Buns and feel the difference.

The President of the United States is not permitted to enjoy this song nor have any hot dogs. He knows why.


If only for one day a year, it's important to remember that the British weren't always the friendly sort of people who gave us the Beatles, the Rolling Stones and Monty Python. They're also responsible for warm beer, vinegar-flavored potato chips, and irritating Anglophiliacs on our own shores schedule as shed-yule and issue as iss-yew. On July 4 of every year, therefore, we celebrate our forefathers having told them to screw.



We not only celebrate the purging of the British blight from our land: we celebrate the manner in which it was done, which was at once brilliant, daring, and easily adapted to the screen. The events that led to our independence are all the more worthy of remembrance, even inaccurately, at this crucial juncture in our history, and I therefore offer the following summary of American independence for the edification of my friends.



In 1774, representatives from each of the thirteen colonies convened in Philadelphia to complain. This was The First Continental Congress. Upon registering their various complaints, they returned home.

One of the colonists' primary complaints was that British cabbies working in the colonies refused to unionize. This was called "Taxis without Representation," and became the issue that ultimately pushed the simmering discontent of the colonies into outright hostility. Sensing the volatility of the situation, British troops advanced toward Concord in April of 1775, forcing Paul Revere to ride his horse (and not to ring bells and warn the British not to take our guns but let's not bring up Mrs. Palin on this holiday.)

The first shot that rang out at the battle of Concord was so loud that its sound reverberated all the way around the world. As a result, the British heard it behind them instead of in front of them. This caused the fog of war. Neither the British nor the Colonists were prepared for fog, so the War was postponed.

In May, representatives once again convened in Philadelphia to complain about the taxis, the fog, and other grievances. This was the Second Continental Congress. Unlike the previous Congress, however, this one tried to work out a deal with Britain's King George. This was difficult, as King George was insane and regularly confused the colonies for colostomies, causing considerable embarrassment to everyone involved but accruing great profit to Britain's flourishing proctology trade.

In June the Colonists developed a Continental Army and a Continental Currency, operating on the assumption that an insane king would be easier to deal with if they had a lot of money and guns. This assumption proved partly correct, as the Brits appeared to ease hostilities for nearly a year. It also proved partly wrong when, in May 1776, the Americans discovered that the King had been hiring German mercenaries to come kill them.

In June of 1776 the Colonists finally decided that instead of working something out with the British it would be easier and more satisfactory to shoot them.

On June 7, Richard Henry Lee of Virginia read a resolution to the Continental Congress. The essence of his resolution was that King George and Great Britain could kiss his hairy American ass. The Congress appreciated Lee's sentiments, and subsequently formed a committee to write a note to King George in which it would be made plain why it had become necessary to start shooting the British.



The committee was chaired by Thomas Jefferson. Its four other members were John Adams and Benjamin Franklin (each of whom was counted twice for the sake of Stature - ok, ok, Roger Sherman and Robert Livingston were also on the committee.)

The Declaration of Independence wasn't a very long document, but little Tommy Jefferson was trying so hard to impress all the older guys that he overwrote it, using an archaic style of English that is best understood in translation.

Here is a translation of the Declaration in its entirety:

"It's a good idea to let people know why you're having a revolution. We think it's pretty obvious that any government that screws its people over is cruising for a bruising. We're not saying anyone with a hair up their butt ought to have their own revolution, but we've put up with an awful lot of crap from King George. He won't let us do anything on our own, and whenever we try, he sends people to kill us. We've asked him over and over to back off. We've told him over and over that we'd only put up with so much. But did he listen? No. So to hell with him and to hell with Britain and all their phony goddam accents. We'll kick their ass or die trying."

These were, what political scientists refer to as "fightin' words."

x

On July 4, 1776, the Declaration was presented to the Congress. Nine of the thirteen colonies voted to adopt it. Pennsylvania and South Carolina voted against it (we know where you live). Delaware couldn't make up its mind, and New York abstained. Copies of the Declaration were distributed the next day (photocopiers were much slower back then). On July 8 it was read aloud in Philadelphia's Independence Square.

The document wasn't fully signed until August, but as soon as it was, Americans began shooting the British in earnest. By February of 1783 they had shot enough of them that Spain, Sweden, Denmark and Russia officially acknowledged the United States of America as an independent nation.



In honor of our Independence, we celebrate the anniversary of its declaration by blowing things up, roasting dead animals over hot coals or gaseous flames, and drinking cold, sudsy beverages that inhibit our ability to think. Such festivities may not honor the philosophical nuances of our revolution, but they do keep the rest of the world at a comfortable distance.



Happy Fourth of July folks!!!

And bunkies remember - Drink til you drop and don't drive! The life you save may be mine.



Demand Euphoria!

Friday, July 3, 2020

Enjoy the Fourth of July Weekend



Remember, Drink til you drop,
and don't drive!
Stay home.

And if you do have to go out,
WEAR A MASK!



Demand Euphoria!

Wednesday, July 1, 2020

Toques off to our neighbor in the North!

In spite of how the man in the White House feels about his former bro, Justin Trudeau, the ACME Eagle Hand Soap Radio Hour would like to salute our friends in Canada on Canada Day.



Canada is the second-largest nation in the world. It is not part of the United States - (it's the U.S.' nicer sister, not dissing Mexico, the U.S.' feistier sister.)

A little jewel sitting at the top of the continent.



In the 153 years of their nationhood, Canadians have given the world paint rollers, snowmobiles, electric organs, green ink, toboggans, snow blowers, plexiglass, and the push-up bra.



Canada has about the same population as California, but fewer Scientologists.

Residents of Churchill, Canada, leave their cars unlocked to offer an escape for pedestrians who might encounter Polar Bears.

Today is the 40th anniversary of the Canadian national anthem, 'Like America, But Colder.'





Canada's leading export to the United States is Canadians. Dan Aykroyd, who happens to have been born exactly 67 years ago today, is one.



Pamela Anderson is another, and was also born today, although she's younger (most of her is north of 40, but some parts are significantly younger).

Other Canadian exports: Bryan Adams, Paul Anka, Alexander Graham Bell, Raymond Burr (of nipple rouge fame), John Candy, Jim Carrey, Celine Dion, Michael J. Fox, John Kenneth Galbraith, Lorne Greene, Peter Jennings, kd lang, Marshall McLuhan, Joni Mitchell (hopefully she's doing well), Alice Munro, Mike Myers,



Catherine O'Hara, Oscar Peterson, William Shatner, Alex Trebek, Shania Twain, Neil Young and of course everyone's favorite Canadian Zen Buddhist, the late Leonard Cohen.



(... Let me feel you moving like they do in Babylon.)




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