Sunday, November 29, 2015

It ain't pretty but it's here

For better or worse, the holiday season is once again upon us. We're proud to bring you the Eighth Annual Holiday video festival.

Today, we bring you - Really Bad Christmas songs.  (I received word from the Geneva Convention that I am non legally permitted to post the Duggar family singing Christmas Carols.  It would be considered a war crime.  Duly noted.)


All I Want For Christmas (Is My Upper Plate) - Stan Boreson & Doug Setterberg



Hearing All I want for Christmas is my Two Front Teeth is cute once, maybe twice during the holiday season. Hearing a parody, like this, of a song you'd rather not hear is about as exciting as dental surgery.


Christmas Time (Don't Let The Bells End) - The Darkness



I first thought that this was a very funny parody of a metal band doing their version of a Christmas song.  I was wrong; this is a real band and this was a real song (which reached #02 of the UK charts.)


(While not quite a Christmas song, if you read on you'll understand why it has been included in this year's list but I must warn you that is you are suffering from diabetes, please do not watch the following video)
There's No-One Quite Like Grandma - St Winifreds School Choir



There's No-One Quite Like Grandma spent a week at number one having knocked Happy Christmas (War is Over) off the top spot, before being replaced by another Lennon tune, Imagine, in the wake of his death.


Boys and Girls (Xmas Time Love) - The Cheeky Girls



I once thought, their other Christmas song, Have a Cheeky Christmas was bad; I can only ask if  you can forgive me for making you even aware of it's existence.


And our perennial favorite -

The Christmas Shoes - NewSong



What list of cheesy holiday songs would be complete without this wretched dreck concerning a filthy child's odd foot fetish (especially since it centers around his dying mother) - always an uplifting tune.



But I will give Patton Oswald the final word on the subject.



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